The Princess and the Pirate

Adventure / Comedy (more)

24 April 2004

Top 5 (excluding Greatest Hits and Soundtracks)

Wow, this was difficult. Mainly because because the majority of the music I buy consists of soundtracks from various movies, TV shows, and anime series. *Shrug* So, this is what I came up with (in alphabetical order by artist):

Ray of Light - Madonna
Fumbling Towards Ecstasy - Sarah McLachlan
Jagget Little Pill - Alannis Morrissette
Ten Summoner's Tales - Sting
Flood - They Might Be Giants

23 April 2004

My 5

Last week, Joe posted his top 5 albums. Unlike Joe, I'm too lazy to provide insightful (or inciteful) commentary. Just coughing up the list, in alpha order:
   Crash (Dave Matthews Band)
   Debut (Bjork)
   Mercury Falling (Sting)
   So (Peter Gabriel)
   Synchronicity (Police)

And here's the rest of my top 10, in alpha order:
   Fashion Nugget (Cake)
   Friend or Foe (Adam Ant)
   Let's Dance (David Bowie)
   Quick Step & Side Kicks (Thompson Twins)
   Violent Femmes (Violent Femmes)

Will we hear from the Princess concerning her list also? We anxiously await!

The Gathering

Last week, I attended an annual event called the Gathering of Friends, hosted by the esteemed American game designer, Alan R. Moon. This was my first Gathering, and after having read reports about the event for years, I admit that I was somewhat reluctant to go. (I often feel that I don't fit in with real gamers, and annoy them with my somtimes purposefully non-optimal play.) But it is an honor to be invited and I decided it would be silly not to at least give it a try.

I roomed with my friend Jim Doherty, who despite having known me for years, still occasionally calls me Jim. It turns out I answer to just about anything anyway. He and I partnered in the Crokinole tournament, were on the same team for Peter Sarrett's Hot Streak game show, and generally hung out together, though I also mingled and met many new folks. Honestly, one of the nicest bunch of people you'll find in a single hotel anywhere.

The games I played:
Can't Stop (x4)
Crokinole (x12, maybe more)
Employee of the Month
Fast Food Franchise
Fresh Fish
Nobody But Us Chickens
Oh, Pharaoh!
Penguin Ultimatum
Princes of the Renaissance

Prototypes I played:
Alfonzo Smith's Malibu
Can't Remember's Veggie Market
Greg Daigle's Secret Garden (not as kinky as it sounds)
Kevin Nunn's Man from S.O.L.I.T.A.I.R.E.
Mike Fitzgerald's Bonnie and Clyde
Stephen Glenn's Galapagos

08 April 2004

Kiddie Fish Porn

This morning, while I was pulling on my socks and shoes, I had Magic School Bus on the terebi. (I have long had an unhealthy attraction to children's educational cartoons; all my college roommates dreadedly remember Maya the Bee.) So the kids on the show were learning about salmon swimming upstream to spawn. After reaching its destination, the salmon-bus (it changes shape and size depending on the episode) ejected some eggs, with the shrunken children inside. Along came a male salmon. Literally. Male salmon swims up, squirts a gelatinous mound of spooge with a cartoon *splort*, bathing the children (inside the egg membranes) in semen. WTF!?

The funny thing is, every time I wrangle the Princess into a bit of slap and tickle, I hear that same cartoon sound effect. Always wondered what that was from. Now I know... it's the damn salmon.

05 April 2004

Perambulation and Other Motivational Speaking

Hard hatted chaps are performing construction work on the street next to the State Capitol Building, where I work. More accurately, they are perfoming destruction work with a Seussian contraption that repeatedly drops a massive cylindrical weight that transmits a deep, rumbling shiver through the entire office. Though my fears are certainly unfounded, when I must leave my desk, I try to walk without rhythm just in case. It's not as easy as it sounds. Try it. You basically get some variation dutifully cataloged by the Ministry.

I dream with some frequency about sliding down stairs, so a couple weeks ago I decided to try it. Almost works. The idea is to put both feet parallel to each other at the edge of the top stair step. Then, rotate your feet downward, pivoting at the ankles about 30 degrees. Your feet slide off the step and, if as long as mine, should land atop the edge of the next step in pretty much the same position. Ideally, the slope and landing position of your feet should not vary between steps, producing a controlled and steady slide down the staircase, but this might take practice. No, I am not responsible for your broken bones.

Another method of movement has made appearances in my dreams. I've never tried this one. Think of stilts upside down, so that the long parts reach several feet above your head. Then, add large, flat hooks to the tops, parallel to your feet, pointing back behind you. (Maybe Ed could sketch this for us.) The idea here is to step onto the footholds (which are fixed to the bottom of the poles), grasp the middle of the poles in your clenched hands, stride a couple of steps to pick up some speed, then lift one side and back-hook a lowish tree branch. You should then straighten that leg to pendulum forward, then back-hook another branch from the other foot and pick up the original foot to unhook from the first branch. Back and forth, swinging from branch to branch. Works in my dreams, anyway.

Sketch Comedy

Joe and I were a bit surprised on Saturday when we drove past the Ingham County Fairgrounds. Instead of the typical Gun and Knife show, there was a big yellow sign that read:
This Weekend
Knife & Bucket Show